5.31.2008

i am SO frustrated right now.

i really need to just make a wedding blog so that there is one place i can either bitch, or be super excited and it doesnt overflow into other parts of my life where others might not care as much.

but right now i dont have one so i'll bitch in here. i mean i could use my livejournal but i find myself going back and forth between this and that and it's the bloggers turn now haha.


anyway, one of the wedding vendor's im dealing with right now is such a bitch. i want to pull my hair out every single time i talk to her. that, or just punch her in the face.

FUCK.


im just having a bad day. they're rare but they still happen and today is one of them!

5.28.2008

hm

im not sure how i like all the pink in this new layout, but i dont really care enough to change it.

the trip to chicago was INCREDIBLE. im glad we went and saw todd's mom friday night and then headed to chicago on saturday. it was the best 4 days i've had in a very very long time.

relaxing, doing whatever we wanted - when we wanted... the wind blowing in our faces and really just having no care in the world. it was a feeling that i absolutely loved and i cant think of anyone i would have rather shared it with.

todd --- he is one phenomenal dude. noone has ever, or could ever, make me as happy as he does. life's not perfect by any stretch of the imagination but the life we have together makes it so that that imperfection doesnt even phase me.

in florida ana said to me "you know how lucky you are right?" and went on to tell me why. you know someone is right for you when everyone around you see's it without you having to create some kind of presentation.

290 days until it's me and him against the world forever hahaha

5.22.2008

2 of my sisters

at times i wonder how people from the exact same bloodline can be so different. maybe not in the better or worse way just very different. my favorite part of it all is that regardless of how different our lives are i feel close and love them. the parts of themselves that i dont have dont brew bitterness or jealousy, but admiration and proudness. There is no competition but genuine happiness for one another i believe. Of course it wasnt always this way - being young and immature we couldnt get along to save our lives but we are lucky enough to have left that behind in becoming adults.

we have alyssa and we have alexa.

we have alyssa -
determined, headstrong, beautiful, reserved but yet so loving and giving. only 16 months younger than me but years ahead of me in terms of accomplishments. working the same job for 9 years all while going to school and supporting herself - here she is a college graduate and going into gradschool. she's honest, she's loyal, and she's supportive. She stands by her beliefs and lives her life as best she, as a human being, can. She goes to Haiti doing things that i would never be able to do. Not only is she beautiful inside as a person but she's beautiful outside. Seriously i dont get how we are related! if she wasnt my sister i'd call her a babe but since she is i will just say that anyone who knows my sister know just how beautiful she is. Here is a young woman who is smart, hilarious, goal-oriented, gorgeous and who was my solid rock for a long time and who still is at times. And i have to say that i absolutely love the fact that i am related to someone who is going to be so successful in this world and someone who regardless of disagreements or times of needing an attitude adjustment [ha] has a heart of gold.'

then we have alexa - another incredible person. at 21 she has been through, gone through, overcome and moved on from things that most people would have no understanding of. she is a person who at one point in time i feared where she'd end up. there are absolutely no words in this life that i could ever use to explain how proud i am of her. she will be a wife in a month and a half and is a WONDERFUL mother of 2 little boys. She is by far much stronger than i ever could be and i have mentioned this to her more than once. I hope that she knows and understands just how proud our entire family is of her and how seeing her in this stable life and happy brings more joy to our hearts than ever imaginable.

and then there is me & anyone who knows me can see the obvious differences here.

this is in NO way meant to be self-deprecating or anything of the sorts. I have great qualities and in no way do i feel a "woe is me" "they are better than me" feeling - i am just stating facts. we are all different and again, its not about who's better or who's worse. None of us are "better" than the other anyway.

really what this is, is just a mere reflection of how incredible i think my sisters are and the many things that i admire and hope to one day be like and how lucky i feel to have at least some members of my family that dont disappoint me and who support me regardless of what i am or what i am not.

im trying!

ok im really trying not to make this a wedding blog, but i do have to say a few things...

with my sleep being totally screwed up i tend to spend my nights reading and searching online at any and everything wedding related to get ideas for the wedding.

one thing that i have noticed is that i looooove looking at people that i know or know of's wedding photos. it makes me feel like a total girl because i get so excited about my own wedding and even though i know i wont look as gorgeous as some of these brides, i get so excited about how awesome im going to FEEL at my wedding.

im not really sure what's happened but lately i am beyond ecstatic about getting married and planning this wedding.

i almost feel silly because im not really the "girly girl" haha but i get so giddy about it lately.

296 days until im a WIFE.

wtf

5.19.2008

CHICAGO THIS WEEKEND!

so stoked. baseball, shows, touristy shit, romance [LOLOL], friends - it will be a blast really.

2 vacations in one month. ruuuules.


Davids Bridal keeps calling me from when i was trying shit on in florida. i keep having to tell them I DONT LIVE THERE i was just visiting so i wont be coming in anytime soon... at least not to their store haha